Have you ever heard someone say, “it’s not you, it’s me.” We’ve always known that’s the biggest lie ever, right? The truth is it was never them and it was always you. If you never heard that before but always wondered why relationships were going wrong, why bosses were always mistreating you, why family relationships or friendships were sour, it wasn’t them, it was you.
I spent years trying to figure out why certain patterns were playing out in my life. I found it odd and even thought I was cursed. Then I started reading a lot, I came across a book by Rhonda Byrne and it was The Power that changed my life. See, that book went into explaining how the power of love which is the highest frequency, changes everything for the better. How treating everyone with love and respect and kindness has that reflected back to you. What you put out is what you get back. Now everyone can say, “I already knew that what I put out is what I get back.” So my question to you would be, “why do you still do what you do and still ask yourself why things are going the same as always?” Gossiping, mistreatment even in thought, being ungrateful, those things have serious consequences and for the most part it turns your life into chaos. If you want to read more into that I suggest you pick up that book to get a lot more insight on the power of love.
That explains a little into why you see some of these people behaving the way that they do with you or certain things playing out a certain way, but like an infomercial there’s more. Once I started practicing loving more and being kind, I started seeing things improve. I started seeing all these “miracles” happening before my eyes. I was in disbelief and couldn’t believe what I was witnessing. In order to achieve this I truly had to unplug from social media for a bit, I had to unplug from friends that I knew would suck me into gossiping or venting and nagging. I did everything I could to truly appreciate everything and everyone. This clearly didn’t happen overnight but damn was I suddenly witnessing better interactions with others, but there were still a couple of things here and there that weren’t quite right. These books teach you the benefits of being in a state of love but what they don’t teach you is how to release limiting beliefs and past traumas affecting certain relationships. You can be all the love in the world but without releasing past hurt and trauma, you’ll end up experiencing certain things in a different way.
See, people are brought into your life so that you can heal parts of you that are “damaged” or to heal that deep rooted belief within you that causes certain things to come up. Maybe you don’t believe that you’re good enough, so you keep getting people who will reflect that back to you. Maybe you experienced something so traumatic that now that you encounter someone else with similar characteristics and it just triggers you to constantly think about that, which then in turn ends up manifesting all over again. You get what you think about the most.
A couple of months ago I started working with a spiritual healer. She helped me understand that I had deep rooted beliefs and traumas that I had suppressed but subconsciously I was still self-sabotaging. It’s funny because I kept blaming others for what I was so desperately running from. When someone is being distant ask yourself where are you neglecting yourself? When someone treats you like crap, ask yourself why you’re not being kind to yourself? Why are you possibly even mistreating others? Trust me, I’ve learned enough to know that mistreatment does not have to come back from the same person you gave it to. People are our mirrors, they’re showing us what we’re running from, or they’re showing us a part of us that we’re refusing to see within us and heal within us. Had it not been for this amazing spiritual healer Natasha that I’m so grateful for, I would’ve kept blaming others for things I had buried deep within me. Cycles stop when you finally address them and heal them, then the full abundance of love can be within you and reflected back to you. It was never them, it was always me. Now that I realized this, I freed myself from the shackles I so shamelessly kept myself in for so long. When will you free yourself? When will you stop torturing yourself? You are worthy of happiness, love and whatever you’re wanting, give this to yourself so that you can finally have that reflected back to you. It’s not them, it’s you.